Prozac could be my best friend...

Day #320- #323:

I almost feel as though this post should come with a warning label. Hold on, peeps. There's been A LOT going on in Kim world. Friday was without a doubt one of the top 10 worst days of my life. All was pretty good until Bowser called at lunch and wanted me to take some kids on a tour. "No problem!" I do that ALL the time. Even better, they didn't have a heck of a lot of time to kill, so we were able to skip the conference center side of the street. I'm thinking, "THIS WILL BE A BREEZE!" Well. We all know what happens when I think. I did my regualr spill through Swampers and down by the pool and up in the Sam Phillips Suite. All that was left was 360. Now, if you all have read the blog before.. or if you know me very well.. you will know that I am TERRIBLY claustraphobic. I'm claustraphobic to the point of I have to have some fresh air or there may be a panic attack. Well, I get on the elevator to go to the top (because for those of you that don't know, the Tower is 22 stories high) and 30 16-year old kids rush in behind me. They find this AWESOME to see how many can pack on. Of course, their teachers remain in the lobby waiting for the next ride, but I wasn't about to let them go up by themselves and tear the restaurant down without someone up there. So we get on, I push the button, we attempt to go up and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. It stops. I nearly had a heart attack right then. ONce i realized we weren't going anywhere no matter how many times I pushed the buttons, I called for help. Our engineers came running, but long story short, for the next 1 hour and 45 minutes, I was trapped, in an elevator, with no room to breath, and 30 16-year olds. I nearly passed out twice myself. Seriously. And they were all looking for me to be the adult. There were only 2 really funny parts. Once about 45 minutes in, they were able to open the door about 3 inches wide and they began handing us in some water. (Thankfully we weren't up in the shaft of the Tower, we were still just above the Mezzanine Level.) Anyway, the kids deduced we were going to be there for a while if they were shipping in water. That was funny. Then, at one point when I thought that we were seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, I said, "Guys, I think we're going down!" And they all freaked out. I quickly followed up with, "In a good way!" It was AWFUL! And of course, every kid had a cellphone and EVERY KID wanted to upload to Facebook and YouTube and all i could think of was "This is going to be a PR nightmare! If i don't die, I will be fired." Finally 1 hour and 45 minutes after the ordeal began, the Fire Department was able to insert an airbag into the small opening in the door and pop the door open. Then we jumped down, about 5 feet to the glorious floor below us. So there we are. Surrounded by Firemen and lined up in front of me are Bowser (the GM), JEnny (the HR Director) and my Chef (who knows I am terribly claustraphobic). I have now spent over 7 hours of my life trapped in elevators. You'd be claustraphobic too if that happened to you. I strongly believe that that has to have some correlation with the fact that I've had 4 fortune cookies with no fortune in them. No way it could get worse, right? WELL... it was my night to keep Grandma. SO, I head down, after a meltdown, and find Uncle Earl, Mason, Coach Shawn, and Justin at Gran's, ready to do some hunting. (The highlight of the weekend was watching Uncle EArl and Coach Shawn attempt to cook breakfast. HILARIOUS!) So my men go off hunting, leaving me to clean the house. As I took out the garbage that they were supposed to take out, I step in dog mess, so I had to leave my boots on the porch because apparently the dog had eaten glue and I couldn't get it off. THEN, as I'm walking bare foot through the house attempting to mop, I step on a WASP! If you've never experienced that before either, I wouldn't recommend it. This is painful. If I didn't believe in a Good and Soverign God, I would swear I really ticked off Buddha. It was also Mason's 15th b'day, so George and I made him a cake and a sign and George painted him a car piggy-bank. George was in less than a good mood, so he wasn't really a ton of fun, and Gran was fussy because she didn't want me driving so late, so finally, I just gave in and took a nap and let the two of them fight it out. Needless to say, I needed me some church time yesterday. Today, much better. No elevators. I had to go to the 6th floor and I climbed every one of those stairs. Just got in from dinner with Kyle and Sister and I just had s'mores... Busy busy busy week ahead. I'll keep you updated. :0)